Sister Mary Red Dress...You have been targeted.


 

Do you ever wonder who that mysterious person is in the vehicle parked beside yours in traffic? Yes, of course it is only John...your neighbor for 10 years now. You wave a friendly hello as you proceed off to your job as a psychotic nun never once questioning the man's identity.

 

Yes, you always respected him in certain ways...always waving back to you with a friendly smile...that is until he was out of your sight. What you didn't know about John is that he has a career too. You see when he wrapped that corner in his car, he was no longer mild mannered John. No no no....he never was.

He is CIA Special Agent Judas P. Dicklestein...

Just look at his insane lamenting as he passes your domicile...glazed over by the power and influence he has over your everyday life. While driving his seemingly mild mannered car he revels in the fact that you believe it is only a Japanese import purchased for his personal transportation and outstanding fuel economy. What you don't know is that the car you have seen every day is a virtual spy machine capable on summoning state of the art satellites to pinpoint your exact location at any time he sees fit.

At any given moment, Agent Judas always knows where you are. A staff of 10 agents at The Central Intelligence Agency work 24 hours a day to ensure your whereabouts even if Judas is too busy shaving his dog to watch you himself. When he is not too busy, rest assure that he is just a nose hair away from the place you think is the safest...

Yes, Sister Mary Red Dress, you have been had, but this is nothing to get upset about. In an effort to better serve the American people, we at the CIA offer this message to you as a community service and as our new outreach program to let you know that your tax dollars are hard at work everyday to ensure your safety. At the CIA, we never sleep and rest assure that we are doing our job 24 hours a day as the eyes and ears of the infrastucture of our fine country. If you have any questions, please feel free to try and contact us. As we pride ourselves in being very secretive, it will unfortunately be up to you to find our email address. This message will self-destruct in 10 seconds.